Thanks for the reply brother. Interesting. If I could ask a few more questions... did you ( at the time of these events ) really mean what you sought? I mean, were you genuine in your quest? ( in your heart to find God? ) What was your understanding of what the Gospel is at the time? ( if you can remember ) The reason I ask this is because many grow up with a different Gospel than what the Bible teaches. There are many counterfeit Gospels floating around. Many I have talked to over the years reject, what they actually don’t understand ( which drives me nuts, not saying you have btw ) Before I ask more, ( about this next sentence ) I would like to know your above answers as this ^^^ blows me away. ( if you care to share ) This makes me think you may have been introduced to a possible mixed bag of Truth [ ie counterfeit ] ( just thinking out loud here, no offence meant brother ) I saw on the other thread you would call yourself a agnostic and not an atheist, that’s great news. So what DO you beleive? What would be your personal take on the big questions of life? Why are we here? How did we get here? What happens after we die? Can we know anything? I am not going to judge you btw, I am genuinely curious. Of all the Christians I know, we all share the same basic set of events. As you can see there are minor variations in each of our experiences with God but all are essentially the same. It fascinates me ( and breaks my heart ) to hear someone say the things you have here, but that’s OK. If you have not given up on God entirely ( why your in a Christian chat room? ) I can attest He won’t give up on you.
On a scale from 0 to 10, how much perfectionism is involved? In my early Christian years I would say 9 to 10, feeling God was asking me the (almost) impossible. Nowadays I would say 7 and I think (so to say) the Lord likes me better now.
Perfectionism in the sense of, 'I did good, but I can always do better' (for example). I'd peg it probably at a 10, although it's not all-consuming so a 9 works too.
I’m glad you’re here, HisLeast. I appreciate the honesty on your part. And I have no problem admitting I could be wrong about things I believe. I’m fallible. I’m steeped in apologetics and not pop apologetics, so it would be hard to convince me. But again I realize the possibility and sympathize with the difficulty of reconciling life’s big questions.
Thanks for the reply brother. Well I don’t think you were not genuine. Probably 10 odd years before I became a born again Christian, I went out on my parents back deck one night ( I remember the nightly clearly ) I looked to stars and said, “God, if you are there I need to know, I can’t beleive this is all just a cosmic accident.” That’s roughly paraphrased. That’s all I said. I meant it. Years later, well, all I can say is he answered me. ( when the time was right?) I would love to hear more on these 4 books you speak of. What is your current understanding of the Gospel? What is it? It’s possible that I cling to a counterfeit paradigm. I will admit that. ( I don’t think I do, ) and I I know you don’t mean to discourage, ☺️ you raise a good point. How do/can we know True Truth? Fair enough. I think the patriarchs knew, if not all, a major part of the meaning of life. I think if the Bible is Truth, 3 things stand out for me. 1. We were created to have a relationship with the entity ( God ) that created us & our reality. 2. We were created for good works ( based on Gods standard of “good” ) 3. We were created to live and enjoy His wonderful creation and ALL it offers. There is indeed much groaning and suffering, I concur. One wonders, does this suffering and groaning stem from not realizing the above 3 perspectives? Both past and present. It’s really interesting that you should say this. I would assert that the evidence overwhelmingly suggests a literal view of Genesis as real history. But this is a matter of perspective and interpretation I suppose. Regardless whether one views this or not, we are still left with the mystery of our existence, was it a cosmic accident or is something else responsible? After all, we are here, something is behind it. Can such a diversity life spring from non-life ( without external energy input? ) Me neither if I am being honest. I don’t know anyone who has returned from the dead. ( well sort of ) We just don’t base things on what we have read tho. ( although I admit, most of what “know” I have read.) In addition the massive physical evidence, there is a weird, indescribable “connection” with what the Bible teaches. In my deepest essence (soul?) something has indeed ‘clicked’ with its message. I know the thoughts and actions that I sometimes do are ”wrong” and can’t tell you why but I just “know” in the fiber of my bones, that they are, if that makes any sense. You mentioned you had some addiction issues and lying tendencies, I can relate. What made you think or feel these were wrong? Just the church telling you so? Dying scares me to, to a degree, but it also now, does not. Prior to conception, I don’t think we existed. ( as much as we can see, but I suppose God saw it all ) Agree. We can. Well, all I can tell you my experience. We all have different ones tho. Wide range from I can tell if the interwebs are to be believed. I am glad you are here. If you want my honest opinion, your here ( in part ) because God has not given up on your desire to find Him. He has placed you in a spot around some great guys, who want to help. Sometimes we miss the forest for the trees. <<< I am guilty! I don’t want to give up on anyone. God does not give me up. ( thank God ) I don’t find you an insufferable d-bag at all. I beleive you 100 percent that you were/are being authentic.
But, geez... he's an alien from Canuckistan currently in a reducation camp in the People's Republik of Chicago... Whaddaya expect?. Love you, HL, my friend...peace tonight
I just wish that many, many professed "Christians" were as honest as HL. When you look in their eyes when the say "Yes, I'm a Christian!" You can almost here the whisper, "I hope I am". Honesty is refreshing.
I concur about HL. However, I don’t know many ( any?) Christians in my circle who “hope they are”; we know we are. I know I am.
Matthew 7: 21 “Not everyone who says to Me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ shall enter the kingdom of heaven, but he who does the will of My Father in heaven. 22 Many will say to Me in that day, ‘Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in Your name, cast out demons in Your name, and done many wonders in Your name?’ 23 And then I will declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from Me, you who practice lawlessness!’ Jesus says there are many!
On questions like these one of our former Prime Ministers once said - life without a goal would be a bad joke.
Just wondering if you are still a helpless addict or if giving up Christianity cured your addiction? I don't ask because I am not compulsive or have no understanding of addiction, I ask because what does God have to do with addiction....if addiction has always been your "normal"?
Prthaps it's just me (and BlueSky this is in no way pointing a finger your way) But with a little discernment, I'd say the majority of people who declare themselves saved most often and declare it loudest are those with the most doubt. (On a side note, frequently around here, we use initials when identifying other member like RK, or HL. I almost did the same with BlueSky!!! Caught myself.)
Interesting direction this has taken... Indeed! There will be many! How terrible that so many thought they knew Him and actually did not. I will try not to dear friend. 20+ plus years so far, so signs of doubt yet. I know so much more, I cant see it happening, but one never knows I guess. Now obedience, that's the hard part. I don't share/have this experience at all, but I am sure it has happened. Majority? wow, that's quite the statement TH. That would mean...wow, so many people I know... You can call BS if you like, no offence taken.