Our (foster) son Rudolf finally has peace of mind. 2-9-1988 --- 5-6-2016 He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, Revelations 21:4
Re: in Memorandum My condolences, sir. On the one hand, it's good for him. But, obviously bittersweet for you. May God bring you some comfort as you need it.
My condolences to you and all who knew him, ProDeo. (Also, I took the liberty of editing the thread title as it was the wrong word.)
I believe I wrote about his first suicide attempt about 2 years ago. Already then we suspected we sooner or later would stand at his grave instead of the other way around as it should be. Last sunday evening I had a 2 hour telephone call in which he announced his departure and wanted to say goodbye. And I knew it, this was the end. Tuesday afternoon we were called by the police that they found his lifeless body. This boy, who (in retrospect) never had a chance the moment he was born despite all the help and care he had after the forced separation by a judge from his parents deserves a holy rant but I am not ready for it. Funeral first and I highly suspect he got help which depending on the type of help would be a criminal act, need to sort out that first too. As for the good news - being raised in the Christian faith he in his adolescence period turned away from God. In his delusions he saw (government) conspiracies in about everything and saw confirmations of that in Revelations. And just because of that (Revelations!) he turned to God again. Hence our choice to put a text from Revelations (21:4) on the funeral card.
Thank you. And all of you. In Holland we are used to the latin version, but I am fine with the english word.
Losing one of my children or grandchildren is my greatest fear, and something I worry about almost every day of my life (goes with the territory of raising a child with severe disabilities I suppose, and understanding how we're all just one step away from the grave at any moment). I therefore can somewhat appreciate, however not fully empathize with, the horrific pain you and your wife must feel. I'm so terribly sorry and heartbroken for you and your wife. I know your world has been shattered, no matter whether you anticipated this or not. You're never fully ready. I'm thankful that you two were at least able to be rays of light in his dark, troubled experience. I trust God will lead him the rest of the way home. Grieving with you both. ((Hugs))
This is what the police found on the (commercial) DVD in his laptop. Laptop was on with DVD inside, needed attributes used as on the DVD.
Guys last name (?) is accurate, though I'm not sure what kind of response you're looking for by sharing that, so you get my 'ffs' and apologies for being bad at empathy.
It's one of those issues I don't know how to react to, so you talk as much as you need and if I pipe up and make a fool of myself, so be it xD
Could you tell me where that link should lead or what it entails? Is this a DVD for sale or...? All I seem to get is a large file, too large, to download, unless windows, which will do nothing
Okay, I downloaded and watched the program. It grieves me that Rudolf was going through this, and I will continue to keep you and the family in prayer.
What a sweet thing to say. There is only appreciation because what do you say to someone who mourns? I always have the same, not knowing what to say when disaster hits people. Like with Tom when he lost his Virginia, I said something after all and then felt stupid afterwards. Maybe that's just normal for some --> many? Anyway, we are in the middle of the preparations arranging his funeral and I have to speech else (sadly) no one will and I hate speaking in public with passion, not good with that. But I will do my duty, my wife and I are determined to honor him with with a worthy farewell. Love you Dani for your comforting words.
May the LORD give you the words to say and work mightily. It's always sad burying those who should bury us.
Yesterday was the funeral. And the unthinkable happened, it was a blessing and parties involved reconciliated. Unbelievable looking at the prospects as we were expecting a lot of negative drama, emotional accusations flying around, resurrecting old scores. Rudolf came from such a broken family, his mother is feeble-minded with an IQ of 55 and emotionally damaged to the core locked up in a closed psychiatric institution. Father, not a bright light either, with a life full of wretchedness also totally unfit to raise children, disappointed Rudolf time and time again, wasn't a father to him. As it goes so often with these kind of less talented people life seems to draw on them as a magnet of bad decisions resulting in never ending misery as if they are destined for a life of unhappiness. Also their second child was taken away from them at age 1½ and she (now 25) wanted to come to the funeral but in the end wasn't able, too much hard drugs in her system, a total addict. Lots of tensions, mother blaming the system that took her children. She might be feeble-minded but there was nothing wrong with her mother instinct, she really loved her children and would do anything for them. It's only that she did all the wrong things. She blamed her ex-husband for letting it happen, she blamed us for taken her son. She cried a million tears and never forgot about her children. Last time she saw Rudolf was 22 years ago when he was 5 years old. And now he was dead, notable by suicide. Not without reason we expected an emotional outburst. And with father and mother came the relatives and friends, a collection of damaged people also. All ingredients for disaster were present. Mother was accompanied with 2 nurses who never left her for one moment alone. That was good. When she arrived my wife walked to her to offer her condolences, that was a risky moment, but mother accepted, then father her ex-husband did the same and she accepted, then the rest followed, the ice was broken. The service began and went orderly and modest as it is common in a western oriented country. Thereafter the (usual) coffee with cake and bonbons and talks afterwards. It's when the reconciliation started, we gave father a photo album of Rudolf's youth plus a copy of the speech, he was so happy with that. We approached mother, gave her the picture of Rudolf that stood on the coffin during the service, gave her youth pictures of Rudolf, those who she could recognize, the music cd of the service and also a copy of the speech and she was so thankful that she even thanked both my wife and me for taking care of Rudolf. Just wow... And then the (for me) bad part started, the hugging. In about 30 minutes I had enough hugs for the next 5 years. Small sacrifice for a true miracle unfolding before my eyes. It was a perfect day. Thank you for your prayers.