I Lost My Precious Mother On Mother's Day: Overwhelmed With Grief And Sorrow

Discussion in 'Bible Chat' started by Rachel Henderson, Jan 1, 2017.

  1. Rachel Henderson

    Rachel Henderson New Member

    Greetings my fellow Christian brothers and sisters,

    I love to speak the truth and I have very serious questions that I think many believers would like to know the answer to. Can you tell me please why does God's word promise so much and yet fulfils so very little to nothing in the lives of many devout Christians, in terms of, for example: long life, health, peace, joy and happiness, etc? Instead, I've seen many atheists who live very healthy, prosperous and happy lives and they obviously don't believe in keeping God's commandments. Doesn't the Bible lose credibility in this way? Isn't this part of the reason why many people don't take God, His commandments or the Bible seriously?

    In other words, why do not all devout Christians live long lives and have optimum health as countless scriptures promise, such as: Psalms 84; 90, 91; 103; Pr 10:27, etc?

    There are many scriptures about healing:

    Exodus 15:26 - “…I am the Lord who heals you.”

    The scripture in John 10:10: states: "... I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full."
    Doesn't this scripture mean that God desires for us faithful Christians to be in optimum health?
    Only when someone is healthy can he or she have life to the full.
    Not when our bodies are incapacitated or debilitated by pain, sickness or disease.

    Psalms 103:2-3 - Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all His benefits: Who forgives all your iniquities, Who heals all your diseases.

    The verse in Proverbs 4:22 refers to God's word and states: "for they are life to those who find them and health to one’s whole body."

    Many other scriptures state that God wants us healed and whole:

    For example: Isaiah 53:5 - But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was on him, and by his wounds we are healed.

    Jeremiah 30:17 - “I will give you back your health and heal your wounds,” says the Lord.

    1 Peter 2:24 - "He himself bore our sins” in his body on the cross, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; “by his wounds you have been healed.”

    Romans 8:11 - And if the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies because of his Spirit who lives in you.

    Romans 8:32 - He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things?

    There are many examples of miracles and healings as recorded in the bible. Here are just a few scriptural examples: Leper in Galilee (Mt 8:1-4); Paralytic (palsy) at Capernaum (Mt 9:2-8); Man with a withered hand in Galilee possibly Capernaum (Mt 12:10-13); Women with issue of blood (hemorrhaging) healed at Capernaum during first preaching tour through Galilee (Mt 9:20-22); Two blind men at Capernaum (on the northern shore of the Sea of Galilee) (Mt 9:27-31); Two Blind Men Departing Jericho (Mt 20:29-34), Jesus raises a dead girl and heals a sick woman (Mk 5:21-43); and many others as we read in: Mt 4:23-24; Mt 8:5–7, 16-17; Mt 9:6-7; Mt 15:30; Mt 20:34; Mk 3:1-5; Mk 5:25-29; Mk 10:49-52; Lk 4:40; Lk 6:19; Lk 7:12-15; Lk 13:11-13; Jn 5:5-9; Ac 10:38, etc.

    Psalm 107:19–20 - “Lord, help!” they cried in their trouble, and He saved them from their distress. He sent out His word and healed them, snatching them from the door of death.

    Psalm 91:3 - For He will rescue you from every trap and protect you from deadly disease.

    3 John 1:2 - Beloved, I pray that in all respects you may prosper and be in good health, just as your soul prospers.

    Here is another example: Psalm 91: Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.” Surely he will save you from the fowler’s snare and from the deadly pestilence. He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart. You will not fear the terror of night, nor the arrow that flies by day, nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness, nor the plague that destroys at midday. A thousand may fall at your side, ten thousand at your right hand, but it will not come near you. You will only observe with your eyes and see the punishment of the wicked. If you say, “The Lord is my refuge,” and you make the Most High your dwelling, no harm will overtake you, no disaster will come near your tent. For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways; they will lift you up in their hands, so that you will not strike your foot against a stone. You will tread on the lion and the cobra; you will trample the great lion and the serpent. “Because he loves me,” says the Lord, “I will rescue him; I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name. He will call on me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble, I will deliver him and honor him. With long life I will satisfy him and show him my salvation.”

    The promise of blessings, including: peace, protection, happiness, healing, long-life and prosperity is not just in the Old Testament (Ex 20:12; Dt 5:16; Ps 34:12-16; Pr 22:9), but reaffirmed in the New Testament (2 Cor 9:10; Eph 6:2-3; 1 Pe 3:9-10).

    Innumerable scriptures promise peace, joy, strength, protection, provision and prosperity. Here are just a few:

    Ro 5:1 - Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ,

    Ps 1:1-3 - Blessed is the one who does not walk in step with the wicked or stand in the way that sinners take or sit in the company of mockers, but whose delight is in the law of the Lord, and who meditates on his law day and night. That person is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither— whatever they do prospers.

    Ps 4:8 - In peace I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, Lord, make me dwell in safety.

    Ps 12:5 - “Because the poor are plundered and the needy groan, I will now arise,” says the Lord. “I will protect them from those who malign them.”

    Ps 16:11 - You make known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand.

    Ps 29:11 - The Lord gives strength to his people; the Lord blesses his people with peace.

    Ps 46:1 - God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.

    Psalm 105:37 - He also brought them out with silver and gold, and there was none feeble among His tribes.

    Ps 119:165 - Great peace have those who love your law, and nothing can make them stumble.

    Ps 138:7 - Though I walk in the midst of trouble, you preserve my life. You stretch out your hand against the anger of my foes; with your right hand you save me.

    Pr 10:22 - The blessing of the Lord makes one rich, and He adds no sorrow with it.

    Pr 22:9 - The generous will themselves be blessed, for they share their food with the poor.

    Is 32:17 - The fruit of that righteousness will be peace; its effect will be quietness and confidence forever.

    Is 41:10 - So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

    Jer 17:8 - They will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit.”

    Php 4:7 - And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

    Php 4:19 - And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus.

    Ro 15:13 - May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.

    2 Cor 9:8 - And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.

    2 Cor 9:10 - Now he who supplies seed to the sower and bread for food will also supply and increase your store of seed and will enlarge the harvest of your righteousness.

    2 Thess 3:3 - But the Lord is faithful, and he will strengthen you and protect you from the evil one.

    3 John 1:2 - Beloved, I pray that in all respects you may prosper and be in good health, just as your soul prospers.


    My mother and I both repented, lived holy lives, with clean hands and pure hearts. God was first love and first priority. We prayed for at least 3 hours each and every day, and studied the Bible for at least 1 hour every day. Prayer was the very first thing in the morning. Our faith was very strong. We strove to obey God's commandments, including keeping the Sabbath day holy. We attended Sabbath services. We served God. Preached the true gospel. We both practiced abstinence, self-sacrifice and self-discipline, so we didn't spend money on holidays, restaurants or other pleasures. We were truly faithful disciples of Christ, by striving to live according to His word. Out of the little that we had, we donated money to charities and helped homeless people. We were never ever involved in occultism. My mother was totally faithful to my father in marriage, although he was very abusive towards her. Although, she forgave him many times, the abuse didn't stop. On the contrary, the more she forgave, the worse the abuse became. It reached a point where she had no choice but to divorce him. From then on, my mother never remarried. She lived the life of a widow for twenty years. We lived a very modest and quiet life. We practiced celibacy and sexual abstinence. Our lives resembled those of nuns. My mother was very protective of me and she taught me to pray since I was two years of age. While parents usually read fairy tale stories to their children, I slept with the Bible under my pillow, which I took with me to the private school that my mother enrolled me in, and I learned about God. We put so much faith and trust in God and I feel like He has really let us down.

    The verses in Psalm 103:1-5 state: "Praise the Lord, my soul; all my inmost being, praise his holy name. Praise the Lord, my soul, and forget not all his benefits—who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion, who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle’s. The Lord works righteousness and justice for all the oppressed."

    My mother suffered from colorectal cancer which spread to her liver and kidneys, heart failure, pulmonary edema and anaemia, including numerous other medical issues. I was completely shocked, devastated and heartbroken when my mother passed away at an early age, and I read her long medical report, which went on and on. She was in terrible pain and had near fatal falls on a few occasions. Despite praying to God continuously, from early morning until late at night, with fasting and begging for my mother to be healed, my prayers returned unanswered. The more I prayed and fasted, the worse her health became. It deteriorated so much that she was bed-ridden for one year and couldn't see the light of day. None of these illnesses run on my mother's side of the family. We both took care of our health by drinking fruit and vegetable juices, exercising and more importantly, absolutely NO smoking, drugs or alcohol. While other people were celebrating Mother's Day with gifts like cakes, chocolates and flowers, as well as dining with their mothers at restaurants or taking them on luxury cruises, my mother was in the morgue awaiting cremation.

    I was extremely offended when my mother's stepsister rang me up saying that she won't be paying for some bones. It would've been a kind gesture to offer some financial support on her part, since she is: 1) my mother's sister, and 2) very rich. She didn't come to visit my mother at the hospital, although it would've taken her approx. 2 hours by train, and said she was busy walking her dog at the beach.

    God's people are plagued by an entire series of extremely serious illnesses—including a number of leading people directly involved in the work. During the 1980's there was a huge number of ministers wives that were stricken. It has always been a fact that wives of so many ministers and church leaders have been stricken by cancer.

    In 2016, Cornerstone Contact Centre pastor Don Cameron died at the age of 45 years, after a battle with cancer.

    Jeffery Largent, pastor of Culver flock passed away in 2016, at the age of 59 years, after his second battle with cancer.

    Church of the Highlands Greystone Campus Pastor Keith Lindsey passed away in 2016 after a lengthy battle with cancer.

    Kara Tippetts, wife of PCA church pastor Jason Tippetts of Westside Church, in Colorado Springs, Colorado, is a devout Christian mother of four, who had stage-four breast cancer and passed away at the age of 38, in 2015, after a long battle.

    In 2014, Steve Hill, the evangelist of the Brownsville Revival, passed away at his Alabama home Sunday after fighting a long battle with cancer. He was 60 years old.

    LaKisha died in 2014, at the age of 40 after an 18-month battle with breast cancer. She was the wife of Pastor Breonus Mitchell of Greater Grace Temple Community Church.

    A Wesleyan pastor, Daniel “Danny” Eiler, age 30, passed away in 2014, after battling leukemia. He served as senior pastor of The Springs Community Church in Ringgold, Georgia.

    David Landrith, senior pastor of Long Hollow Baptist Church in Hendersonville, died at age 51. Landrith was diagnosed with an extremely rare and aggressive form of cancer known as colorectal melanoma in 2013.

    In 2009, founder and pastor of Victory Christian Center in Tulsa, Oklahoma, Billy Joe Daugherty's battle with cancer took a turn for the worse as he fought an infection at Houston's M.D. Anderson Hospital. He passed away at the age of 57 years.

    The list goes on and on ...


    My mother's faith was very strong right to the very end when she passed away, and I wish to point out the fact that I even called for the elders of the church to anoint my mother with olive oil, as the following scripture states in: James 5:14-15 - Is anyone among you sick? Let them call the elders of the church to pray over them and anoint them with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise them up. If they have sinned, they will be forgiven.

    The scripture obviously wasn't fulfilled in my mother's life who was a faithful Christian, and the lives of many other faithful Christians.

    As stated previously, God's promises are not just found in the Old Testament, but reaffirmed in the New Testament, as we read in James 5:14-15 as well as many other scriptural references that I've already quoted previously.

    At the beginning of the chapter in 1 Cor 12, we read that Paul is addressing brothers and sisters. "Now about the gifts of the Spirit, brothers and sisters, I do not want you to be uninformed."

    Verse 7-10 mentions: "Now to each one the manifestation of the Spirit is given for the common good. To one there is given through the Spirit a message of wisdom, to another a message of knowledge by means of the same Spirit, to another faith by the same Spirit, to another gifts of healing by that one Spirit, to another miraculous powers, to another prophecy, to another distinguishing between spirits, to another speaking in different kinds of tongues, and to still another the interpretation of tongues. All these are the work of one and the same Spirit, and he distributes them to each one, just as he determines."

    One of the important ministries of the Holy Spirit to believers today, is His bestowal of spiritual gifts on Christians at the time of their conversion.

    Ephesians 2:10 mentions: "For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." The only way we can do good works is if our bodies are not incapacitated or debilitated by pain, sickness or disease.

    If gifts of healing and miracles are operating in the lives of Christians in these churches, then there would be NO sicknesses, suicides, and crimes such as murder happening there.

    Suicide is happening at an alarming rate in the Churches of God with so many pastors committing suicide.

    Living Church of God - Joplin, Missouri pastor Karl Beyersdorfer killed himself on 5/27/2016.

    Others who committed suicide in the Worldwide Church of God are mentioned in the below article:

    hwarmstrong.com/suicide-statistics.htm

    The following verses refer to believers in Christ Jesus:

    Mark 16:17-18 - And these signs will accompany those who believe: In my name they will drive out demons; they will speak in new tongues; they will pick up snakes with their hands; and when they drink deadly poison, it will not hurt them at all; they will place their hands on sick people, and they will get well.”

    The following link displays an article on miracle workers who couldn't heal themselves:

    bible.ca/tongues-miracles-fake-pentecostal.htm

    The list goes on and on.

    Please note: I have much to write about these very important issues, therefore, I've included another page.

    Thank you.

    God bless you,
    Rachel Henderson
     
  2. devilslayer365

    devilslayer365 Wazzup?!

    Sorry to hear about all this. I don't have any answers for you. I struggle a lot in my Christian walk, just to be honest. Though I have issues with various things, deep down I know it to be the truth. Actually, the one central to our faith, Jesus, is the Truth. I don't think I could ever totally walk away. I hope others more "spiritual" or "seasoned" or whatever will chime in and offer you more help than I have.
     
  3. Timothy

    Timothy Administrator Staff Member

    Well, lets see if I can get some kind of answer for you sister. Can I take it one at a time?
    Because things do happen to us just like they would to the lost. Matthew 5:45 That ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven: for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust.

    Consider Paul and his thorn in the flesh. He asked God to remove it from him and the answer probably wasn't what Paul expected at all. I don't know. 2 Corinthians 12:6 For though I would desire to glory, I shall not be a fool; for I will say the truth: but now I forbear, lest any man should think of me above that which he seeth me to be, or that he heareth of me. 7 And lest I should be exalted above measure through the abundance of the revelations, there was given to me a thorn in the flesh, the messenger of Satan to buffet me, lest I should be exalted above measure. 8 For this thing I besought the Lord thrice, that it might depart from me. 9 And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 10 Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ's sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong.
     
  4. tango

    tango ... and you shall live ... Staff Member

    First of all, I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. I also lost my mother to cancer and know what a brutal illness it can be.

    That said, the overriding issue with using a lot of the verses you have posted is the context. There's a lot of support going around these days for the idea that God promises us perfect health in this life but it's just not there in Scripture, if it's all taken in context.

    If we look at the beginning of time we see Adam and Eve eat the proverbial apple and get driven out of the garden. Key words spoken by God here were "For dust you are and to dust you shall return" (Gen 3:19, NKJV). This shows that we are mortal and we will die. If we will die then either we get sick and die, or we live our lives perfectly normally until, without any warning at all, we just drop dead on the spot. In that regard I'm thankful my mother was sick before she died, because it meant I had chance to prepare myself for losing her, and had chance to say goodbye to her and spend the last moments of her life with her (my wife didn't have that luxury with her father, who died suddenly and totally unexpectedly from a massive heart attack).

    Now look to the end of time, and the end of Scripture. We see John describing the new heaven and the new earth where "there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying" (Rev 21:4). When the new heaven and the new earth arrive we will be free of sickness, pain, sorrow and death. Until then we live in a fallen world and sickness is sadly just one part of living in a fallen world.

    The reason context is so important is because if we take things out of context it's very easy to slice-and-dice Scripture, cut it up and string it together like a ransom note, then boldly stand on the promises only to be disappointed because either God never made the promises at all, or he never made them to us.

    First off, I'll look at Ps 103:3, which is widely used by those who promote the "health and wealth" message. This was a psalm written by David who, along with "heals all your diseases", noted that God "forgives all your iniquities" (both mentioned in Ps 103:3). But David was a righteous man in all things save for the matter of Uriah the Hittite (1Ki 15:5). Uriah the Hittite was the man David sent into battle so he would be killed so that David could be with Uriah's wife Bathsheba, who was already pregnant with his child. David repented of the matter when challenged by the prophet Nathan, but God struck David's son and he became ill and died (2Sa 12). So for David to know that God forgave his iniquities he must have written the matter after his son had died, and therefore known very well that God did not heal all our diseases this side of heaven. Key words here were spoken by David, "I shall go to him, but he shall not return to me" (2Sa 12:23, NKJV) - he acknowledged that one day he would see his son again but his son would never come back to him. So clearly David wasn't referring to physical healing the way the prosperity gospel preachers like to think.

    Likewise Is 53:5 refers to "by his stripes we are healed" but to assume this means we are guaranteed perfect health is to ignore the element of atonement for our sin. The stripes on Jesus' back bought us the chance to be healed spiritually, the chance to have our sins forgiven, not a guarantee of perfect health this side of heaven. He basically bought us a ticket to the new heaven and the new earth.

    Php 4:19, referring to how God will meet our needs, is also often misused to suggest that everything will be wonderful here on earth. People talk of their "needs" all the time but most of the time the things we say we "need" are merely things we might like to have. We don't need a new car, we don't need a new kitchen, we don't need all sorts of things that we refer to "needing". Earlier on in that very chapter Paul talked of knowing plenty and hunger, of abundance and need (Php 4:12), so it's clear Paul wasn't talking from experience of having a wonderful life full of material wealth all the time.

    Your comment about Eph 2:10, how we can't do good works unless our bodies work, simply isn't true. I personally know one lady in the advanced stages of MS. The disease has slowly destroyed her body but she still does enough good works in the church and outside to put most of us (myself included, sadly) to shame. Another lady I personally know has been disabled for most of her life and the assorted adaptations she has had to made to simply live have destroyed most of her joints. She is also very active in the church, taking part in all sorts of outreach programs. These two people continue to do plenty of good works despite battling with disabilities that would cause many people to simply lose hope and give up.

    Where promises are concerned it's important to make sure God made the promise, and that he made it generally rather than specifically. To give an example, last year a friend of mine asked if I'd help him shift some furniture one weekend and, since I was free, I agreed that I would. So to put that in vaguely Scriptural language, "I am tango who helpeth thee move". If in a year's time someone else who overhead me promising to help my friend shift furniture decided to stand on that promise and not book a moving company they would be disappointed when I failed to show up to help them move. If they tried to stand on my promise they'd still be disappointed, simply because I never promised them anything - they took a specific promise that applied to one person and tried to use it as if it applied to them. So when God said "I am the Lord that heals you" in the book of Exodus he was speaking to the Israelites in exile. That doesn't necessarily mean God will heal us on demand in this day and age.

    At this point it's important to draw a critical distinction. When rejecting the argument that "God always heals" many people who support the argument will assume the opposite of "God always heals" is "God never heals", which is equally false. "God always heals" is countered by "God does not always heal", which could include "God never heals" or "God sometimes heals". The claim that "God always heals" is disproven by one single example where God did not heal and likewise "God never heals" is disproven by one single example where God did heal. "God sometimes heals" is consistent with observations and with Scripture, given Paul told Timothy to "take a little wine for your ... frequent infirmities" (1Ti 5:23)

    Throwing Rom 8:23 into the mix and seeing how we are "eagerly waiting for the adoption, the redemption of our body" and I think it's clear that when we receive our resurrected bodies we will be free of sickness and death, but until then they are merely some of many issues we have to deal with in a fallen earth.
     

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